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Adam Sandler lyrics
Album: Shhh...Don't Tell [2004]
| Tracks | 20 |
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| | 01 | | Sid & Alex |
| | 02 | | Pibb Goes Surfing |
| | 03 | | The Amazing Willy Wanker |
| | 04 | | Gay Robot |
| | 05 | | Pibb Tries the Skateboarding |
| | 06 | | Creepin' On the Mayor |
| | 07 | | The Mayor of Pu**ytown
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| | 08 | | Timmy Tinyhole |
| | 09 | | Pibb Takes the Mexican ATV Tour |
| | 10 | | Wolfman |
| | 11 | | Secret
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| | 12 | | The Boss and the Secretary |
| | 13 | | Best Friend |
| | 14 | | Pibb Needs the Hot Rocks |
| | 15 | | The Mule Session |
| | 16 | | Newlyweds, Sleepyheads |
| | 17 | | Calling Home |
| | 18 | | Mr. I Do and the Doo Doos |
| | 19 | | Whore! Where Are You?! |
| | 20 | | Stan the Man |
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| Back to Adam Sandler albums |
| The Mayor of Pu**ytown | |
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Yo it's 2004
No, you can't be asses thinkin' you real pussies
Ya'll ain't seen shit yet
And your mayor's gonna let you know
Oh yeah!
Guess who's back?
It's the motherfucking pussy with the little nut sack
Don't care about Jeta, or the Paperchase
I'm a fucking grown man with zits on my face
I'm straight up chicken shit
A pansy ass punk
If I'm on your ass it's an automatic slam dunk
While thugs are at the party bustin' all yall's asses
I'm hiding in the corner wonderin' "Where the fuck's my glasses?"
Can't afford no rims my ride's a bucket
Fuckin' dick's so small no bitch can suck it
Don't pop nines, I got weak rhines
Back in the ninth Jews, I got pissed on ten times
I roll solo I ain't got no crew
I say, "Please don't hit me" more than a cow says, "Moo."
Afraid of heights I'm ascared of the dark
I walk an extra three miles to avoid crazy fucks in the park
Denied by the Bloods turned down by the Crips
My fuckin' aunty kicked my ass and she's got two plastic hips
When I step to the club feel free to stare me down
'Cause I just got re-elected the mayor of Pussytown
Yeah, by a landslide you pussy motherfuckers
(May-or of pus-sy town)
C'mon c'mon
When bangers hit the street I stay home and watch TV
Slump down on the couch so no one can see me
Unless I hear somebody knockin' on my door
Then you'll see me crawlin' across the motherfuckin' floor
I've been a fuckin' coward every day of my life
That's why I pretend I don't know everyone's bangin' my wife
I won't sit on the porch I don't want no trouble
I'm more afraid of goin' out then a fucking boy in a bubble
When the shit goes down I make a break so fast
Look like a motherfuckin' rocket goin' past
Searchin' for the stinkiest place to hide
Straight into the ladie's room I ain't got no pride
Slippin', slidin', runnin', hidin'
You know damn well it's a scooter I'm ridin'
Oh no! Here we go out come the glocks
I take off so fast I pop out of my socks
If you're gonna fuck with me I'll cry then run
I called the cops when I got shot with a fuckin' squirt gun
Oh yeah! Yeah!
Blinds up shut your eyes
Touchdown! He's a pansy almost shit
He'll get up and leave the other way if you pat his grandma's tits
Well I had a little poodle but my neighbors stoled her
I'd shoot 'em with an AK but the kick hurts my shoulder
I can't pop a gun and I can't fist fight
Hell I'm afraid to take out the fuckin' garbage at night
I use the steps in the pool 'cause I'm terrified to dive
Don't fuck with my floaties they's what's keepin' me alive (Bitch)
Never drink rummy, never dealt crack
The one time I smoked weed I had a panic attack (I can't fuckin' breath)
If you're lookin' for my dick in the men's locker room
Best bring your binoculars with a fucking super-zoom
No I'm just playin' I don't fuckin' change in there
The one time I did got my bush sprayed off with Nair
Think I didn't stick up for myself? No fucking doubt
I did what I do best I blew it the fuck out
I ain't looking at you I ain't trying to front
It's okay with me you called my jimmy a cunt
Freakin', sleepin', crawlin', creepin'
When the gangs are bangin' I'm in the basement sleepin'
I'm straight from the streets I've seen trouble from every side
When the shit hits the fan I throw on a fuckin' disguise
Fake nose, fake wig, fake beard, it all works pretty good
Or sometimes I just use a map and a funny accent
And say I got lost in the hood, motherfucker
Yeah, now all you coward motherfuckers out there
Walkin' 'round with your head hangin' low just 'cause you licked one dick
Just know, my man the mayor had to suck off his whole high school
Case closed
May-or of pus-sy town
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| Secret | |
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Adam Sandler
Secret
Lyrics
There's something I know
That no one else does
You want me to tell you what it is?
But if I did that then it wouldn't be, a secret
I've gotta move my body tonight, I'm gonna go dancin'
Dreamin' bout the nights at the club, with the fun and romancin'
Mommy sees the look in my eyes, she can tell something's different
Daddy doesn't understand why, but he can tell something's different
I've got a secret, my own little secret
No one knows my secret, cause it's a secret.
Shhh don't tell, Shhh don't tell
I trimmed my buuuuuu-shhh don't tell
I trimmed my buuuuuu-shhh don't tell
And nobody knows that my bush is cut low as I dance and I sing and I put on a show
And i'm feeling so free, nothing hanging off me while the bass gets stronger I'm a half an inch longer
And I touch it and rub it and pinch it and squeeze it and tug it and twirl it
and flick it and swirl it, and fuckin and suckin and fuckin and suckin and fuckin and suckin
Fuckin and suckin, Fuckin and suckin!
Music if fillin my body from my head to my toes
The DJ gives me a smile, maybe he knows
I hear whisperin from my left to my right, all over the party
i'm the super-star of the night, I did somethin naughty
I gave myself a haircut, don't tell
I'd like to tell you where but, don't tell
I've got a secret, don't tell
It's my own secret
I trimmed my buuuuu-shhh don't tell
I trimmed my buuuuu-shhh don't tell
And I feel so special and so beautiful
As I reach down and give my new friend a quick pull
I'm scratchy and itchy and a little bit bitchy
and if I find scissors i'd trim my friend Ritchie
And I touch it and rub it and pinch it and squeeze it and tug it and twirl it
and flick it and swirl it, and fuckin and suckin and fuckin and suckin and fuckin and suckin
fuckin and suckin fuckin and suckin!
I can wear my pants extra low tonight
My secret's gettin out of control, it's burstin out of me
Gotta drop my pants to the floor, so the whole club can see
The special way I trim my curlies, so fuzzy and soft
Cause when my shrub is short and tight my piggie won't get lost
I had a secret, don't tell
But now you know my secret, don't tell
I gave my bush some haircuts, don't tell
To emphasize my bare nuts
I trimmed my buuuuu-shhh don't tell
I trimmed my buuuuu-shhh don't tell
And I touch it and rub it and pinch it and squeeze it and tug it and twirl it
and flick it and swirl it, and fuckin and suckin and fuckin and suckin and fuckin and suckin
fuckin and suckin fuckin and suckin!
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